Happy Birthday to me, I have offically made it to 23 years old! It's taken me a long time to get here but I have finally achieved it, I wanted to do a little birthday post a classic 2014 YouTube trend of 23 things i've learnt at 23 i'm not expecting this to be breathtaking for you all or even life changing. I just want to drop the experience bomb. I don't want to make this all philospofic but it might turn into that.
1 | It's okay to say no
Sometimes you just want to stay at home in bed doing nothing but scrolling through the instagram explore page or going clubbing really isnt your thing. I put myself in a lot of situations that I found difficult or made me anxious for the fear of saying no, I learned a long time ago that it not worth putting myself through something that is going to make me sad just to please others.
2 | Do whatever the hell you like
If you want to post something a little "cringe" on your instagram story, start a blog, become a singer literally anything that you enjoy just do it, the judgement from other people truly isnt worth it. When I first started my blog I was so scared of what people would say about it, or if people would laugh at me so I didnt share it for months barely even letting my closet friends read it until one day I thought fuck it and i'm so glad a did. I still sometimes get that fear when I post something a little out of my comfort zone but in all honesty people who dont care wont read they'll just scroll past and that is okay with me.
3 | You don't need a thousand friends
In school life felt like a popularity game, now I have a handful of close friends that I know are friends for life and I wouldn’t trade any of them for a thousand friends.
4 | Just let it go
It's not worth holding grudges, yes there is people that I don't like and don't agree with some of the things they have done in the past but it's just not worth being caught up over. I'm alsotrying to apply this to myself too, not let myself get caught up in mistakes i've made in the past.
5 | Take as many pictures as possible
The people we see most often are the ones we tend to have the least pictures with, with the creation of snapchat I feel like I capture a lot more moments but I have learnt that there is never enough pictures of you with your loved ones.
6 | Be nice to everyone
Whether it's a shop assistant, someone on the bus or your best friend in the world. Live life being as nice as you possibly can it makes all the difference to you and everyone else. Negativity attracts negativity.
7 | It's okay not to be okay
It can be a little cliche but I think it's true we all get a little sad sometimes and that's okay supressing thoughts and feelings in my experience just makes them worse and harder to deal with in the future. There is no shame in therapy and it can help more than you could imagine.
8 | School isn't the best time of your life
There is no way in hell that school was the best time of my life, I hated it. University might have been the best time in my life so far due to the people, the exprience and I was finally learning infomation about a subject I have a passion for. Don’t feel pressured if school or uni life isn’t going as good as you thought you have forever to have the best time.
9 | Long Distance Friendships Can Work
It can be extremley hard when you can't just text and meet up in an hour but myself and Molly prove that it can work, she is one of my best friends in the world we speak everyday and make a conscious effort to meet up. This is also the case with my uni friends we often communicate with each other about life. You just have to put in the effort, your best friends arent nessecarily the people who live next door.
10 | Read More
Whether it’s books, articles or blogs reading is good for clearing the mind and helping to de-stress but also reading the news and popular articles not just relying on Twitter moments for all of your news helps to broaden your knowledge and understanding as to what is happening around us. (Edit; the world right now is scary but twitter is where the real stories are being exposed not the news)
11 | Spend Less Time on Social Media
I can not deny that social media is amazing! I have met some of my best friends in the world online and started my own photography business using social media as my main business platform however, there is also a lot of negatives that social media brings from body image to not being in the moment. Try spend even an hour less a day on your phone, you’ll feel the difference.
12 | Try Not to Judge One Another
First impressions matter I can’t dispute that but I try super hard everyday to just let people live, what others do tends to not effect or concern you. Let people do what they wanna do and be who they wanna be you’ll be a much better person for it.
13 | Not Drinking Alcohol is Totally Fine
After my anxiety issues alcohol was a big no no for me, the thought of clubbing was just too much and I wasn’t sure how alcohol would affect me and that worried me a lot. A couple of years later and I know I can have a pint or a couple of gins every once in a while but I don’t feel pressured to drink if I don’t want to. Throughout university I would often just stay home and have a movie night for one whilst my friends went out drinking because I didn’t enjoy it so I didn’t want to go and that’s totally cool! Don’t let anyone force you to drink and don’t force yourself it’s just not worth it.
14 | Write A List
Personally setting myself little goals and ticking them off gives me a feeling of being productive. Keeping your life organised can help to keep your brain organised too. It can often get a little hectic and even a list can’t solve it but it’s a start.
15 | Work As Hard As You Can No Matter What Job You’re Working
You are being paid so naturally you should work hard but sometimes when you’re in a job you hate that feels impossible but it’s important to work as hard as you can! This builds a strong work ethic that you will eventually take to a job you enjoy (or at-least don’t hate) it will also give you more job satisfaction when you walk out the door knowing you did all you could.
16 | I Love You
This has became part of my everyday vocabulary I am always telling my family and friends that I love them I think it’s important, some people find it difficult to say and that’s okay but a little love and appreciation never hurt nobody. I often felt ashamed for being “too much” but now I’m cool with how loving I am and that is called growth!
17 | “Nobody Knows What They’re Doing”
This is a phrase I have heard over and over again but it’s true being in your twenties is a weird time for everyone, some people are off getting married whilst others are moving across the world. Everyone is on different life paths but no one knows where they’re gonna end up or if they’re doing the right thing, life is a personally journey not a group race.
18 | Learn How To Be Alone
I am still very much working on this I struggled a lot to be in my own company especially when I first moved back from university I’d gone from a house of five people to me and my mum. We have established that I am a clingy friend but I am slowly learning to be able to have a good time on my own, from taking myself shopping to going to the cinema on my own it’s good to be able to do things alone I’m happy I’m on the way to improving my needy-ness.
19 | There’s Some Amazing TV Shows & Films Make Time To Watch
Again this is something I want to continue to do and make more time for there is some incredible entertainment out there especially coming from Netflix and Amazon Prime. Make time to sit down and watch them, be entertained and you never know might learn something.
20 | Everyone Can Benefit From Therapy
Everyone has baggage they need to unpack.
21 | Dogs & Pets Make The World A Better Place
Unfortunately right now it's not fair for me to have a dog, I work full time and live with my Mum but eventually I will have a little pooch to call my own but for now I can make do with visiting friends who currently own a doggy. Just being around animals makes me so happy even as simple as seeing a cute dog across the street fills my heart with joy.
22 | Not Everyone Is Going To Like You
Personally I don't want everyone to like me, if that was the case I would feel like a robot woman with no personality of my own. The people who like me I truly value with my entire heart and I want in my life, I don't need everyone to like me.
23 | Life Is Long
I am a big believer in take opportunities life gives you and treat every month or so as your last (treat everyday like your last doesn't work for me I don't want my last day to be me at work) and live life to the fullest as much as you can and want to.
That being said, there is endless time to figure life out. You don't have to know exactly what you want to do by the time your 18 just try everything. Fail, fail and then fail again.
Well that ended up being quite deep sorry about that didn't plan it that way. I really enjoyed writing this post and thinking about what I wish I knew when I was about 15.
I'm off to celebrate my birthday now!